Sex & Relationships

Dating Tips for the Post-35 Man

Straight from the brain of an infamous pickup artist. You be the judge.

As the host of VH1’s The Pick-Up Artist, the 36-year-old Canadian named Mystery has sent legions of shy young guys out into the pickup wars. With his weird fluffy hats, eyewear, and black-painted nails, he tends to divide viewers into two camps: Half of them think he is an irredeemable asshole, the other a savior of men. We asked the computer geek turned magician turned dating expert if he has any advice for post-twenties men—you know, the kind of guys who don’t want to date the kind of women who are turned on by fluffy hats and black nail polish. “I’ve discovered the basic requirements, what I call ‘attraction switches,’ that have been universally ingrained in women through millions of years of evolution,” he says. “And with 3.3 billion men out there hardwired to survive and replicate, and only about 28,000 days for each of us to make that happen, men of every age can use these techniques to up their game.” Here, Mystery reveals what it takes to set yourself apart from all the “monkey robots” out there:

Be seen with other women. “When women see that you’re accepted by other women, it communicates that you have something to offer them—I call this one ‘pre-selection.’ Plus, it doesn’t matter if it’s at the gym, at a PTA meeting, or with friends at a nightclub, beautiful women are always found in groups. Accept it, embrace it, and show them you can hang.”

Bring the competition with you. “Having your friends around you shows women that you have a committed social circle. You’re communicating that you are loyal and that if they were in a relationship with you, they’d have a support system of great friends that they could align themselves with.”

Leave your doormat at home. “Women give us shit because they want to know that we’re normal, that we have the same emotions as they do, and that we won’t keep things bottled up. They test us to see how we’ll respond. So if you’re upset about something she does, let her know; don’t just smile as if nothing is wrong. You’re not impressing her with your maturity; you’re saying either ‘I’m a pushover’ or ‘I’m a time bomb.’ ”

Take risks. “Karaoke? Sure. Salsa dancing? Bring it on. Stepping outside your comfort zone and successfully taking risks translates to reproductive success in the minds of women. If you’re a successful risk taker, then, should you ever have children together, not only will you be able to adapt to the challenge of child rearing, but it also stands to reason that you will produce children who will be successful risk takers too.”