Family & Fatherhood

The Book of the Dad

Thirty-five simple rules for surviving the toughest 18 years of your life

1 REDUCE SIDS ANXIETY. SIDS deaths have declined more than 50 percent since the American Academy of Pediatrics started its Back to Sleep campaign, which recommends always putting your baby to sleep on his back in a crib with no blankets or toys. This approach is equally important for daytime naps, according to a new study in the International Journal of Epidemiology. If you have a helicopter wife, one who constantly hovers over the crib, consider a Halo SleepSack, a sleeveless blanket/swaddle that takes the place of loose clothing that can bunch up around the baby’s nose and mouth. It is the first product endorsed by the SIDS Alliance ($33; halosleep.com). After six months, you can ease up on the worry. SIDS isn’t a concern at that point.

2 INDUCE FASTER SLEEP. It has long been suspected that a consistent bedtime routine helps babies fall asleep better, and a study supported by Johnson’s presented at the 2007 Pediatric Sleep Medicine Conference confirmed it. Babies treated to a soothing regimen—a bath and a massage, followed by quiet activities—fell asleep 37 percent faster, stayed asleep 23 percent longer, and spent 50 percent less time awake during the night.

3 LEARN LIFESAVING SKILLS. Six hours of classes sounds bad, but in about the same amount of time you would burn watching a baseball double-header or racing a half Ironman, you could learn CPR and first aid—skills that can save a life—at your local American Red Cross. Prioritize to make it happen. It’s worth paying the $75 to get your favorite babysitter certified as well.

4 AVOID SYMPATHY FLAB. Up to 65 percent of expectant fathers exhibit some of their pregnant wives’ symptoms, whether it’s weight gain, nausea, or headaches, according to various studies. New evidence indicates that this tubbing up isn’t psychosomatic—it has ancestral roots. Expectant male monkeys show significant weight gain during their mates’ pregnancies, suggesting that they’re preparing for the rigors of fatherhood in the jungle, reported Biology Letters. Since the missus will be tired a lot, use her naptime to become reacquainted with the rowing machine in the basement.

5 TRAIN HER MEMORY. Changing just one component of your baby’s over-crib mobile every week exercises her memory by forcing her to compare what’s there now to what was there before.
 
6 SERVE HIM BRAIN FOOD. Just as visual cues nurture your toddler’s intellect, so can nutritional stimuli. Babies who are breast-fed for at least six months have a significant IQ advantage over babies who are weaned early, according to neurologist David Perlmutter, MD, author of Raise a Smarter Child By Kindergarten. That’s because human breast milk is the world’s best source of DHA, a fat that triggers the brain to produce brain growth hormone and build cells. Not possible? Other DHA-rich foods: fish (in limited amounts), cod liver oil, and formula mixes that include algae-derived DHA supplements, such as Enfamil Lipil and Similac Advance.

7 PLAN FOR COLLEGE PAYMENTS. As dizzying as the tax codes have become, it’s now easier to figure out how to best save for your child’s college tuition: Invest in a state 529 plan. Last August, Congress made permanent a law that allows qualified withdrawals from a 529 to be free from federal income tax. Plus, the savings you have in a 529 don’t count against federal financial-aid calculations when it’s in the name of the dependent student. Each 529 plan is different, so do some comparison shopping at morningstar.com. The Chicago-based mutual fund rating service has a 529 section that lets you compare all 50 plans. Check what benefits exist for in-state residents and look for plans that offer low fees and index funds.